You Need to Calm Down

You need to calm down is a phrase I’ve been hearing often lately (not always directed at me). I have also been one to use this phrase.  This phrase is often used in arguments or disagreements. Some are offended by the phrase, while others simply blow it off. Often times our reactions to this phrase are dependent upon the context in which it is being used.  There are times when it is used generally about an overall situation or directed towards a specific individual.

But the trust is . . . even if you don’t want to hear it, sometimes we do need to just calm down. I know I often overreact about simple unimportant situations if I am already stressed out about life or if I am simply exhausted and emotional. But taking a deep breath and a step back to truly look at situations we are stressed about is often beneficial. It can allow us to see things from a new perspective or realize that what we are upset about isn’t important. It also prevents us from hurting others or acting rashly only to regret our actions later.

For example: If you order pizza and it takes two hours to get to your house. You will probably be upset, but is it worth it? Is it worth stressing out and getting upset and possibly yelling at the delivery person? No. The pizza still got to your house. It was likely still very delicious and it is very possible that the delivery person was not at fault. Maybe they simply were short staffed and had way more orders than they could handle. The delivery person is probably stressed and upset themselves. So why not simply say thank you, pay for your pizza, be polite and possibly make some one else’s day better.

We need to calm down in our close relationships too. We set expectations for those close to us, usually because we fall into a pattern of behavior or because we want the best for those we care about. But schedules change, people get busy, and what is best for you may not be best for everyone. It is important to calm down and realize that you cannot control others. If some one cancels plans, consider their reasoning before assuming they are simply blowing you off or being rude. If someone makes a decision you don’t agree with, remember that everyone has their own path in life.

We are all human. We all make mistakes. We all cancel plans. We all change our minds. But we must also try to be kind and have respect for each other. So please take a moment to calm down before ruining not only your own day, but possibly some one else’s too. It is better to be calm and approach situations with a level temper and open-mind.